My mountaintop experiences used to last for “long” periods of time…like several days in a row. My valleys were few and far between. Unfortunately, my mountaintops are turning into hills and the valley come more frequently.
My prayer lately has been:
Lord, I don’t want to be the kind of person that always needs a sign from You for encouragement. I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where Job got encouragement every other day from You. I want to just trust You out of sheer obedience but….Lord, I can’t help it. PLEASE speak to me.
For now, God hears and answers my prayers regularly with the manna needed to keep putting one foot in front of the other and living for Him.
You may have noticed that my blogs have slowed up lately. I have been seriously considering my motives in publishing. Is it because I like to be the center of attention? What good is coming from my posts and of course, the flip side is, How is this blog hurting others? It has been argued that people are being hurt by my words and believe me when I say, that was never my intent. However, nor was I as intentional as I could be about protecting other players in my story. These are the things I have been wrestling with for the past 4 days.
Did you all feel the earthquake last night? In a funny way, I almost claim earthquakes as my own thing…you know, ever since the Dream. When last night’s quake hit, it didn’t occur to me that the Lord might have been working. It wasn’t until the morning time when I was journaling my “pre-8am” prayers that I remembered God using an earthquake to speak to me.
In my prayer time, I asked God to give me wisdom regarding this blog (yes this schizophrenic post is circling around to make sense). I admitted that my moods, emotions, hormones and thoughts were all over the map and that I needed real clarity from the Spirit regarding every decision, including how to proceed with this Blog.
When I was done praying, I opened up the devotional book “Jesus Calling” by Sarah Young and opened up to today’s message:
I speak to you from deepest heaven. You hear Me in the depths of your being. Deep calls unto deep. You are blessed to hear Me so directly. Never take this privilege for granted. The best response is a heart overflowing with gratitude. I am training you to cultivate a thankful mind-set. This is like building your house on a firm rock, where life’s storms cannot shake you. As you learn these lessons, you are to teach them to others. I will open up the way before you, one step at a time.
As I praised God for again speaking so clearly to me, I was reminded that in April, I had shared with my readers that I had intended to end my blog in the summer but I felt compelled by the Lord to keep it open for some reason. I just didn’t yet know why. I said that, no matter what, I would be obedient and keep blogging as God commanded me. Well, obviously, it is clear now and I must obey. Yes. The blogs will continue whether you read them or not (but I hope you do read them!) and I will be wiser regarding content. And as God spoke to me this morning through Sarah Young, I am charged to teach my lessons to others (ugh – it sounds so haughty).
The lesson today, my dear friends, is that God Speaks. (I wonder if I can claim that as the title of my book someday. Nah – I’m sure it’s already taken). Friends, God speaks but you must be in His word, you must listen to Godly people and you must pray.